I went to see my anthro counselor today. I got a substitution approved for my minor, which means I can for sure graduate in four years if I get into all the class I want.

Aside from the approval, she wasn't any more or less helpful than anyone else I've talked to (so far) regarding my future. She was, however, reassuring. Just a mention about my uncertainty about grad school and she talked about what I could do in my year(s) off. It sounded like the natural course of things! She mentioned the "doors opening" bit too. How things usually just fall into place if you know where to look.

It's strange. I feel like I've changed over the past few weeks. For so long, I've held myself in these little niches. And these niches were safe, but they were also boring. They didn't allow for change. I got comfortable with this. Too comfortable.

But I feel like I'm evolving. I'm growing into myself. I'm seeing more differences between my roommate and me, which sounds weird, I know, but I'm realizing the depth of these differences for the first time, when I should have noticed them long ago. She's the most selfish person I think I've ever known, almost completely incapable of compromise, and entirely unwilling to accept another way of being or thought.
I'm seeing this now. I'm seeing how she's condescended to me since she found out my grad school drama. I'm seeing how she expects me to compromise. And I'm tired of it.

I want to be a well-rounded individual. I want to be able to explain photosynthesis and the symbolism behind a great piece of literature. I want to understand how the muscles work and why people think like they do. I want to write! I want to wonder at the water molecule without relinquishing my creativity! And I believe that I can do both! I can be a scientist without losing an entire half of me!

It just bothers me that one of my best friends can't see this.